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2 Samuel 13:1-39

Open rebuke is better than love that is hidden. [Prov. 28:23; Gal. 2:14.] (Proverbs 27:5 AMP)

I wonder if David spoke to his sons? I wonder if he shared with them his hopes for their lives, his fears, his missteps, his sins. We have big fat white elephants standing in the living room, yet no one acknowledges it while they take up space, pooping on the floor and eating up everything in sight. It is a common practice amongst families to ignore that which is troubleing be it behavior, past grudges and perceived wrongs. Why is it that we attempt to hide things that are out in the open? We ignore their presence then act with great big surprise when the consequences of our failure to acknowledge what is so visibly obvious standing in front of us, bares fruit.

I don’t know when the Fifth-first Psalm was written exactly but it does seem that David knew that his sin with Bathsheba not only called for death for both parties, but also was a blatant abuse of his power. David wrote that Psalm to be song in the Temple by the choir. Did David share with others his broken and contrite heart before he shared it with his family? Do we commit sin with our families all around us and fail to confess what we have done to them, while baring our hearts to others?

We wrongly think that what we do inside the cocoon of our family unit will not affect and effect our children, spouses and nieces and nephews, but in truth, our actions speak louder than our words. God didn’t have to put a “curse” on David because his sin, our sin, gives fruit to its own consequences. David’s actions with Bathsheba did not happen the instant he saw her bath on her own rooftop, it happened in his heart with other women at other times. And beside all that David had a multitude of wives there was no need to go after someone else’s. We don’t just roll out of bed one morning and commit adultery, or murder, or rape or steal. The sin has been going on in our hearts long before we put feet to our thought and turn them into actions.

You are jealous and covet [what others have] and your desires go unfulfilled; [so] you become murderers. [To hate is to murder as far as your hearts are concerned.] You burn with envy and anger and are not able to obtain [the gratification, the contentment, and the happiness that you seek], so you fight and war. You do not have, because you do not ask. [I John 3:15.] [Or] you do ask [God for them] and yet fail to receive, because you ask with wrong purpose and evil, selfish motives. Your intention is [when you get what you desire] to spend it in sensual pleasures. You [are like] unfaithful wives [having illicit love affairs with the world and breaking your marriage vow to God]! Do you not know that being the world's friend is being God's enemy? So whoever chooses to be a friend of the world takes his stand as an enemy of God. (James 4:2-4 AMP)

I am of the school that David knew who Bathsheba was because Uriah was one of his Thirty Men of Valor. Maybe he did not know who she was personally by sight, but he would have had to know that Uriah had a wife. In addition, Bathsheba’s father, Eliam, was also one of the Thirty. (2 Samuel 23:34, 39) and Eliam’s father was Ahithophel, David’s trusted advisor who when he gave counsel it was like the voice of God.

Can you imagine the reverberations throughout the palace, the gossip, and the cries of “hypocrite?” Those on the outside of the family may operate in forgiveness quicker than those in the family especially when unforgiveness is planted deep in the hearts of one’s children. The spiritual leader of my church has a teaching out on Video that makes this statement, “When we fail to forgive in such a way that we hold a grudge, we take upon ourselves the sin of the one we are holding a grudge against and then are doomed to repeat their mistake because we carry their sin.

Exercise foresight and be on the watch to look [after one another], to see that no one falls back from and fails to secure God's grace (His unmerited favor and spiritual blessing), in order that no root of resentment (rancor, bitterness, or hatred) shoots forth and causes trouble and bitter torment, and the many become contaminated and defiled by it-- (Hebrews 12:15 AMP)

David had Uriah killed, one of his Thirty men of Valor, the consequence: Absalom had his on brother killed.

What grudge is hidden in my heart? What elephant is taking up space soiling my relationship with God? Whose sin am I holding on too that if I don’t let go will propel me to commit that same sin but exponentially? Forgiveness is not about the one who sinned, forgiveness is about me giving no place to the devil in my heart. Forgiveness frees me from the sins of others.

2 Samuel 14:1-15:22

As a shepherd, there is one thing that David knew, protect the sheep. As king of Israel standing as the chief shepherd to God’s people, was David protecting the sheep of God’s pasture by bringing Absalom back to Jerusalem? Mike, I am going in the opposite direction that you have taken regarding the restoration of Absalom. And my premise is this: You cannot make peace with someone who has war in their heart I don’t care what the relationship is or with whom.

Clearly Absalom continued holding a grudge against his father (Hindsight is always 20/20), and David was operating out of his emotions and sentiment grieving for Absalom, not based on a godly or biblical principal. In the pattern of sacrificial offerings, there is a clear outline of the way to godly reconciliation/forgiveness and it is not by presenting a “Fellowship” offering first. What is offered up first is the Whole Burnt offering, and then the Sin offering, after that the Thanksgiving and Fellowship offering can then be presented. The pattern for establishing intimacy with people can be found in how God directs us to establish intimacy/restoration with Him. There is no forgiveness of sin without the shedding of blood. Nothing like that was ever initiated by Absalom. Or if it was, then the “sacrifice” was one only in act and not heartfelt.

David’s relationship with Absalom was never broken David was always his father. What was broken or what needed to be established was their fellowship. Was there really ever any fellowship, true fellowship and intimacy with his children outside of Solomon?

Earlier I spoke of the elephant being in the room and no one acknowledging it or speaking of it. What David did was to bring the elephant back into the room and that room was probably already crowded with a lot more of them all he did was increase the size of the heard.

Internal sores/abscesses must me lanced no matter how painful the procedure. When we leave them to fester inside the body, we cause more problems, possibly death, then if they were attended to. You can’t heal a would by saying its not there it must be attended too and that was not followed. Because Absalom could gather together an army of co-conspirators, including Bathsheba’ grandfather, shows how the internal wound festered inside the body of Israel.

If the son was to be brought back then the reason why he killed and ran should have been addressed with all the pain that would bring.

If a man willfully sheds the blood of a person [and keeps the guilt of murder upon his conscience], he is fleeing to the pit (the grave) and hastening to his own destruction; let no man stop him! (Proverbs 28:17 AMP)

Grace and peace,
Ramona

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